Let's just say I made quite the splash on OKcupid and in less than a week I had my first date lined up. We will call this gentleman Starbursts Guy for reasons that will become clear. I was going through my inbox when I stumbled upon a witty message which ended in 'your move carebear.' Things I love: challenges and when people I just meet call me carebear. Basically, he had me at good-bye. So he cleared the first hurtle of sending a charming yet witty message. Next, the profile check. You have to see if the same wit conveyed in their message is also present in their profile or if they somehow just got lucky with a random one-liner. Well i read his profile and I must admit I even LOLed. I know, it was pretty crazy. So check on cool message, check on awesome profile, now to look at the quick stats. The quick stats for me are: age, height, kids, and occupation. He passed all of those with flying colors and it was on to the last step, the picture. This can be rather tricky as I don't want to come across as shallow but then again I am and I just have to sometimes judge a book by its cover. So I checked his pics and he look like he was a good-looking dude so I said to myself, 'this may just be a diamond in the OKcupid rough!' and I messaged him back. We message for a couple days and then he asked me the deal breaking question, what was my favorite starburst flavor... that's when I knew he was date-worthy.
So you may be wondering how you go from just messaging to hey let's awkwardly meet each other in person and hope we are as hot as we look in our pictures. Well basically, someone asks for the other's number and then suggests to meet up. Well he did that and I said yes so we planned to meet at a local bar on a Wednesday night. I include that it was Wednesday to bring up the fact that this was a very casual meet up. It is kind of like a half-way date I suppose.
So the evening comes and I am sitting in my car outside the bar thinking, 'o shit this is going to be weird.' I quickly review our messages (a must given that you do not want to confuse conversation with another person with the person you are on the date with!) and his pics so I can try to recognize him instead of walking around the place like a lost puppy. I walk in and luckily it is uncrowded and I spot him right away. We say hello and have an awkward hug and sit down at a table. He has a beer already and I order a water. Sidebar: I am not currently drinking so it really just ups the whole awkward factor which is rather awesome... really facing the fear of meeting others head-on.
Well, I must say I didn't quite know what to expect but I did have somewhat high expectations when it came to his funny factor. His messages were hilarious and I hoped that would transpire into verbal conversation. Well the fact that we were on an awkward first meeting was probably a hindrance on the funny factor and that he is a writer so one who can write witty can't always talk witty. But he was a bit humorous just not as much as I had dreamed of.
So as we sat I tried to think of interesting things to converse about and then I wondered,' do we bring up the whole we met on an online dating website thing or not?' Shit why had I not consulted Laura about this?! Well just as I was about to excuse myself to go call Laura in the bathroom, he asked me simply, "so is this your first time?" omg it was like he could tell I was an OKcupid virgin! So that launched into a whole conversation about his past experiences on OKcupid which I found quite entertaining. He had been on a handful of dates over the past two years but none had really transpired to much more than a few months worth of hanging out.
The date crept on and I found myself yawning and staring blankly at the mounted tv screen playing some sports game. I do go to bed freakishly early so I figured my boredom/tiredness was due to my inability to stay up past 10 on weeknights as opposed to the signs of a failing date. So We wrapped up the night and he walked me to my car. Of course on the walk to the car that little voice in my head was thinking what every person thinks after a first date, shit are we going to kiss good-bye? There should really be a rule for how to end dates like these like ok one the first date you give a high-five good-bye then the second you pound it and on the third you hug, etc. But there is no such rule book so I had to think to myself the proper etiquette. I decided the date went well but that there was not an outpouring of chemistry or affection so a casual hug would be best. Luckily he felt similar or so I assume since we hugged it out at the end and waved good-bye.
Overall, the date was pleasant yet the chemistry was not present. Driving home there was a strange feeling of accomplishment that I had branched out and done something fun and random yet also a feeling of let-down that the person I was so attracted to online was not quite the same person in reality. I suppose that is the problem with online dating, it allows you to attribute certain qualities and traits to a person since you only have a few pictures and message to go off of. So my first internet date with Starburst Guy was pleasant yet left me wanting to find a guy who could bring those colorful, witty written messages to life. Probably would have been best if we had just remained pen pals.
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